Category Archives: Life

Happy 45th Anniversary to My Love!!

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Happy 45th Anniversary to My Love!!

Marcia J Ballestero to Martyn J Ballestero

Happy 45th Anniversary to The Love of My Life, For the Heart of My World.

The more our story unfolds, the happier I am that I chose you and you chose me to love and laugh and live with….

The home we have made together is my haven from life’s storms and I feel God there with us.

It has been a peaceful place to be with security and trust and lots of Love.

And at the heart of it all…there is you. Making even ordinary days extraordinary, reminding me how good life together can be.

The more our story unfolds, the more deeply I Love You.  Yes this is Happy 45th Anniversary and no unhappy feelings just a feeling of being so blessed that it was you God brought into my life at 18 years old. I was young, very young but I was so content and confident in my choice I made.

I Love You because I feel so much Love from you.

Our home  we made together has always been a haven from life’s storms and my quiet center.

1965

You have always made sure I knew you Loved me and I am glad that when we got married the courting did not stop. You have never been shy about saying elaborate loving words and compliments. I say Elaborate because I know many wonderful wives that wonder why they never hear those words. They got married and the fun courtship days were over. It has NEVER been that way with you.

As a Preacher you have been wonderful to hear. You are always so studied and interesting and can make someone understand and love how they hear it preached.  You have been a fair and loving father to our children and so generous with whatever we had to them.

You have NEVER been a tight wad type , you have never ask me one time what I spent of our money or what it was on. If there was money to spend you made sure I felt free to spend it.

You made fun times for the family and the list would be so long about the many times you have made my road so easy by being kind anyway no matter what was going on. We have a loving enjoyable by our God’s help and that you and I have been so much in Love with a purpose for our life. Our Purpose has been serving Jesus with our best we had and having a loving peaceful life together with as many Joys as we could fit in.

Thank You for all the years of nice conversation, thankful for your compliments which are so continuous no matter how homely I feel. You are a protector, of my feelings, our spiritual dedications, and just so many important parts of our life together even as a family. Thank You for making good times better. I Love You with all my heart.

Love Marcia

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Once a Friend Always a Friend!!

Once a Friend Always a Friend

I hope the days of my title are not over. For me if I think I make a friend I may not call you regularly like you might want me to , but when I see you I want you to feel I still love our friendship. There are many reasons why you might not be able to keep a friendship and I know that.  There are friends that are embedded  into our hearts because of family, situations, association and then there is kindred spirits that bring you together. There are so many reasons that can start friendships and the Bible says a Friend Loveth at all Times.

I have friends that I enjoyed and loved so much because of our likeness in our families, our husbands in ministry, on and on situations. Some have come into my life and some have gone and when I see them again it seems they really could not care less if we talk again or smile together again. I don’t take that lightly it brings a touch of grief to my heart but I realize somehow there has been a change that I did not want but I can only keep my own spirit tender and I really just can only go as far as I am allowed to go in renewing our friendship again.  With this situation I want to always not respond in a rude unkind way a gesture their way is all I should do.  If the gesture is not accepted then I have done all I can do and no bitterness or unkind talk will repair our misunderstood friendship.

A lot is left up to me as to how things get repaired or become easier for me to even handle. I know in my own heart if the problem of the separation is my fault. Even in a marriage if you are rude and unkind or you have made rash statements and mistreated your companion or children a simple I am sorry I did you wrong is the quickest healer if you follow it through with more patience and tenderness which signals the other person you really meant what you said. Some people want to just smooth over rudeness with a smile or a gift without saying the wonderful healing words of I AM SORRY!! Why are those words so hard even you did not start the stress you probably lost the fruits of the spirit in the middle of the problem and now you need to repent face to face , eye to eye with you wife, husband , child or friend.  Those three words smooth the road better than any gift or whitewash technique you can try!!

Friends can make mistakes and hurt in a weak moment. One that does it constantly might not be considered a close friend. Some folks have a hard time keeping friends because they offend and are offended without restraints often. They disregard the Fruits of the Spirit and are selfish, and are possessive, maybe they somehow can’t handle more than one friend at a time because they are jealous and have a problem with sharing and caring through it all.  Some people are always so needy that you have a full time job when you have a friendship with them. They  are takers but have a hard time giving. When they are sick  or have a problem they expect you to be there, but if you have one and they know it they aren’t there for you and they just turn their head.  In My Lifetime I have learned and heard it said you have maybe three or four close friends. You have many friends maybe but then there are those that seem to stick close through thick and thin, through disappointments and sorrow and disillusionment they will hang in there.

Growing up I remember noticing that when some people had a clan of friends that they did things with and that seemed to be their main circle our family seemed to not have any certain folks other than family that we went on trips with or constantly fellow shipped.  I grew up feeling like I had to be able to live for God without having any certain friends or fellowship. I was pledged to doing the right thing to the best of my ability with help If I needed it and with God and family at my side.  I always thank God for Family and Friends they are a treasure in a world that can be cold and uncaring. If I want them to be there for me then I am there for them when I am needed. Life seems to give you back what you give out. If you are grouchy and stingy then you will reap very little tenderness or returns of generosity. Some people are so afraid that they will be taken advantage of if they are givers of their time and love and money. In all things you can control giving if needed, but if you aren’t careful you have little control over stinginess and selfishness.

I want to keep my heart and life tender and yet strong in the faith in what I know is right for me to keep close to God. Friendships are so important I want to be easily intreated as a family member and friend or saint of God.  I want to always feel like I am a Friend of God and if I am a Friend of God I will have a way that will bring Friends into my life to encourage and care about.  Friends are so necessary in marriage if you are not friends you sure got yourself in a fix for having a contented , caring, fun homelife. Why are people so afraid to marry a good friend,  and why do people cease to be friends when they get married?  I have heard a q uote , “Only a Friend Will Tell You” , some married people cannot even discuss fairly easy subjects let alone something that really needs to be talked about. They are not good enough friends maybe because the wife cannot trust the husband in money because he is careless as to taking good care of the family to the best of his ability. Just spends Crazy and she gets nothing back for her efforts as far as cash but he can spend what and whenever he decides. That can be vice versa, but the Bible does say for the Man to take care of his family or he is the same as an Infidel. Now days the men expect the woman to share in the outside job.  The roles have switched a bit. There may be a need but we need to remember that when you are friends in a marriage there is much more companionship and less anger and jealousy through it all. Never do we have physical violence or mental beat downs to settle our differences. Surely being a person that loves God and has the Fruits of the Spirit working can get through life showing they are friends and Trust the Lord and are gentle and trusting companions.

If I have ever felt like a friend I hope I can still be trusted and loved as a friend till Jesus comes with his help I am sure I can do that if you want me as a friend.

Organize and Reorganize!!

Organize and Reorganize

That has been my motto in my life. I have come to this conclusion years ago when I had five children and more responsibilities than I knew what to do with. I have never been totally organized but I have felt so good when I did try to. What I realized was,  how much easier life is for someone that even makes a stab at being organized.

Sis Huntley, Christy, Marisa, Christyana and myself at a tea room in Raleigh, NC

Many times I memorize telephone numbers maybe after hearing them even once. I know I am amazing, right? Well, I am not 100% sure so I have made address books and list to remind me. I have learned to organize our bills and keep them in a separate folder or drawer so if my mind isn’t clear it won’t be that hard to put my hands on them. I make a list of all the account numbers, customer service numbers when they are due and how much. I do those extra things to calm my mind for those calamity days when everything hits at once and you are not prepared.

Sometimes I feel like a airhead and I hear people called airheads, no wonder. When you don’t think before you speak and you speak and blurt out just the wrong thing…it doesn’t take much of that before you feel like you are making some boo boos even with your speech. I have made a few mistakes like that, but again organizing what I am saying and why I am saying it and who it might embarrass or hurt is important.  I have embarrassed myself before and it feels awful even if I didn’t mean to say the wrong thing.

Andy and Jasmine our youngest .

I try not to be so fussy with my house that my family cannot relax because of a mess. Mess happens in a family and I will not shine my house or have a fit if something gets out of place now and then. If I lose a lot of time cleaning and being a fanatic in my house cleaning then I will see visitors and family come and go and feel a loss because my focus is what happens to my clean house. You can go too far either way. It is very uncomfortable to go to a home that is squeaky clean and they are still squeaking over how dirty their house is and you can’t even have time with them to sit and talk or have a bowl of popcorn and laugh and talk.  The type of person I have been probably doesn’t fit Organization.

Papa Ballestero and Zion, Jeron and Chloe this past summer.

I do know that when my guest get there I want to be prepared to open the door without having to say excuse my house. I have been unorganized many times and will still be unorganized I am not that great at it, but I am working on it because I like to worry less and be able to not miss out on the good feeling that comes from being as organized as possible and having time to enjoy the fun and the good moments in life that I might miss if I live in a mess.

I have seen parents look at their children and expect so much from them. They want them to do well in school and clean their rooms that are so messy that the child feels just as overwhelmed as the parents. The parents can’t cope and don’t clean things as a good example enough for the child to understand how to do it.  If it is drudgery for the parent that gives out orders and hopes for the best without showing how to organize in a nice manner then a no care attitude enters the mind.

Braden, Me and Carlton Anthony and Kim's boys!

Every kid is different, some learn quick and some learn slow. The manner in which you teach them to work under pressure may work at times, but it may also not be all that gratifying to work if it is with strong words and harsh pressure. Make work a bit of fun if possible.  Don’t expect every child or teen to be the same about work. I thought some of mine would end up never being good housekeepers. They are now that they are married and they do clean. But they have learned from me when company comes sit down and enjoy them. Don’t keep your dusting rag in your hand and sigh and scowl at every little mess that happens.

Huntley Starr Ballestero

Just like kids notebooks for school every so often as they grow older it makes it easier if they go through and organize and put in order their assignments, or class order. We teach organization from how we handle things. Like I said I Organize, then I reorganize over and over in my mind, heart, car, house, jobs, just pretty much every part there is a good feeling when you reorganize and smooth out the rough edges that leave you rattled and nervous.

If I expect my young ones to do well and think and not forget than I don’t need to push them and let myself slack. We all have our slack moments but pretty soon when we want to have a little more fun and peace we get our mind, heart, important papers, bills, food and on and on in a more neat organized fashion. I don’t say I did it all perfect, but I learned from experiences that Working at it sure helps for the peace of mind.  If you are always a last minute person and yet you like things just right and all of a sudden your time is gone and you go screeching around your house barking orders and blaming others for stuff you could have done with a better way about you, that will defeat you and you really should keep those moments down for the sake of your children’s peace of mind and your families  peace .  Work should not always be a horrible task make it rewarding all you can. Not just paying money for everything but fun can be an attitude which makes the work go faster.

We all have rushed , troubling moments, but when it becomes a way of life for us we need to reorganize and get priorities in line. I see people that never seem to get the idea of preparing ahead of time and if they did what they could they would have much more free time and more calmness’.

Garrison, Cade and Ainsley Marisa and Brandon's kids.

I used to get baby bottles ready washed and water in them ready for the formula. I would put a baggie of snacks for those moments when baby or little one might be hungry. Get the diaper bag ready a bit before. So many ways we take the drastic moments out of life.

Being a Good Steward of what you earn and keeping your tithe up to date and knowing what you owe and when. That keeps the mind more at peace. Being forgetful must not be the norm or you will suffer and peace of mind will be hard to find. We can’t expect a child to be something we are not. They learn from us. I wanted home to be a place of refuge and peace as much as possible. Time for fun and games like children love, and a house at least clean enough to be glad to let someone in. No one should expect perfect but it will seem perfect if there is good food, peaceful people that smile easy and clean enough that you can feel comfortable to eat, sleep and have fellowship.

I have been to school and Sunday School Class rooms that seemed so cluttered and like no one cared. That is a hard place to learn. I have been in homes including my own where disagreements were mounting because the mess around just added a little more fuel to the fire.

Christyana and Christian Bryan and Christy's kids

I was blessed to have a husband that never said a word about the house. I am so glad he was kind and sweet enough to realize there were times I just couldn’t keep up or didn’t feel well enough to make it neat, as it should be. There is times we can not help it , but a peanut butter sandwich in the corner for weeks could say someone really doesn’t care.

I am not comfortable when I go to a home where they act like you are going to mess up their home. Or they wipe everything as you touch it. But there is a happy medium and just an all around good feeling that comes when you know you have searched your heart, mind and soul, and you are working at having things with some order and manners .

Marty and Marisa last summer at Highlight Root Beer Stand!

You want to please your husband , God and Family and friends with just a easy , neat and sweet manner of life. Things do get in disarray, this life is fast and sometimes furious but there are always a few areas that if we take notice and smooth out the road by rearranging and try once again to have peace come back and enjoy those simple pleasures of life. I have found it to be a blessing to never give up but try again and keep up and enjoy things that are so important.

Some times it seems easier to just overlook and ignore all the things that seem so simple like they don’t matter, but in driving you have to mind the simple things like watch where you are going, turn just right, make sure baby is strapped in, stop at the light. If you don’t you will go through life and not be safe, you will be maybe not able to live through the accidents you end up in. All because you don’t take care of looking where you are going, stopping when you should, watching the gas level.

Some Organizing is a lot less trouble than not going to the trouble to Organize.  You forget less when you write down a birthday you want to remember, or keep track of the checks you write in your checkbook. This organizing is much simpler than the alternative of living sloppy and just careless with things all a mess. You will enjoy life better if you just organize and it will get unorganized that is life, just try again a reorganize. I will work at it too I assure you I like it better than when I am unorganized!!